"I had completely forgotten to get baby carrots"

Street art

Men are so sneaky

"Ladies first"
is just a nice way of saying
"Let me look at your ass while
you walk in front of me"

Men are so sneaky.

Men are so sneaky

Love is like a rubber band held at both ends by two people. When one leaves...it hurts the other.

"How in the world did your alimony check get way up there" ?

''You idiot, I said kit inspection"

"The moment you feel like you have to prove your worth to someone is the moment to absolutely and utterly walk away."

Losers stare at the problem. Winners look around for the solution

A camel can work for a whole week without drinking..